sometimes you feel like a nut...

...sometimes you don't.

Remember that jingle for Almond Joy and Mounds? Apparently it was most prevalent in the 70s, but since I remember it and I hadn't yet graced the earth with my presence (I kid, I kid--is there actually anyone that smug?), I guess it carried on over into the 80s.

Although I often feel like a nut (in more ways than one), I won't lie--I prefer Mounds. There's something annoying to me about a big ol' hard hunk of almond in the middle of an otherwise soft, sweet bar. That said, I won't turn down an Almond Joy; I just wish the almonds were sliced and scattered.

The cake I made for our Easter meal (which incidentally doubled as my birthday celebration) was no massive undertaking. I had limited resources with which to work, and this was the best I could do. Thankfully, even though I was forced to morph into Sandra Lee for a hot second, the cake was delicious.

Inspired by the undeniably tasty Almond Joy bar, I combined a devil's food cake mix with the usual suspects, as well as almond extract (hardly a suitable replacement for almonds, but what can ya do?), coconut cream pudding mix, and flaked coconut. If I had had some sliced almonds at my disposal, they would've gone in as well.

The result was a perfectly pretty and quite tasty dessert. It was a wee bit on the dry side around the edges, but that was effectively remedied with some vanilla ice cream or, even more deliciously, some leftover cream of coconut.  I briefly considered going all out with the semi-homemade notion and frosting with Cool wHip, but regained my senses just in time.

Almond-less Almond Joy Cake
(based on this recipe)

1 box devil's food cake mix
1 (3.4 oz) box coconut cream instant pudding and pie filling
4 large eggs
1 cup water
1/3 cup vegetable oil
1 teaspoon almond extract
1 cup flaked coconut

Preheat oven to 350°F. Grease and flour a bundt pan.
Combine the cake mix, pudding mix, eggs, water oil, and extract in large bowl. Beat until moistened. Stir in coconut and pour into pan.
Bake for 40 to 45 minutes or until toothpick inserted in center comes out clean.

read more words!

setting the (candy) bar

Are you an Almond Joy person or do you prefer Mounds? Or, as a tragic option, do you eschew both, claiming that coconut is gritty and gross (I'm looking at you, Little Brother...)?

I consider myself a Mounds gal, but that's only because the whole almonds in an Almond Joy are so bulky and incongruent--there's no way to get a bit of almond in each bite unless you a)shove the whole thing in your mouth, or b)pop off the almonds and take a bite of candy bar followed by a nibble of almond. Ridiculous. If slivered or sliced almonds were used instead, I'd be all over it. Take note, Hershey's!

Having said all that, it's no surprise that I used sliced nuts in this Almond Joy-inspired cheesecake. Other magnificent components include a graham cracker crust riddled with coconut (which I consider a complete dessert in and of itself) and a creamy cake bedecked with chocolate chunks, toasted coconut, and a bit of coconut flavoring.

I'll admit that I'm not too keen on the flavor of almonds, but I do love the crunch the slivers provide. The amount of nuts used in this recipe is just right and there's none of that icky almond extract to muck up the flavor. What a relief.

Zagnut.

A few days after I made this, I had a Zagnut candy bar for the first time. Zagnut, where have you been all my life? Why do you taste so good and have such an awesome name? Crunchy peanut butter + toasted coconut = amazing. Because of this discovery, I think my next cheesecake endeavor will involve a peanut buttery crust and a purely coconut filling. Oh, yeah.

Not-Too-Almondy Almond Joy Cheesecake
(based on this recipe)

Crust:
1 1/2 cups graham cracker crumbs
1 1/2 cups sweetened flaked coconut, toasted
1/2 cup sliced almonds, toasted (about 2 ounces)
1/4 cup sugar
1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, melted

Filling:
4 8-ounce packages cream cheese, room temperature
1 cup sugar
4 large eggs
1 cup sweetened flaked coconut, toasted
1 tablespoon coconut extract
1 cup sliced almonds, toasted

Optional garnishes:
chocolate shavings or drizzle, slivered almonds, toasted coconut

For crust: Preheat oven to 350°F. Wrap outside of 9-inch-diameter springform pan with 2 3/4-inch-high sides with foil. Finely grind cracker crumbs, coconut, almonds and sugar in processor. Add butter; process until moist crumbs form. Press mixture onto bottom and 1 inch up sides of pan. Bake crust until set and beginning to brown, about 12 minutes. Cool. Reduce oven temperature to 325°F.

For filling: Using electric mixer, beat cream cheese and sugar in large bowl until smooth. Add eggs 1 at a time, beating just until blended after each addition. Mix in coconut and extract . Fold in almonds. Transfer filling to crust. Bake until cake is puffed and no longer moves when pan is shaken, about 1 hour 15 minutes. Cool completely on rack.

Run small knife around sides of cake to loosen. Release pan sides. Sprinkle with garnishes before serving, if desired.

read more words!

the joy of the almond

We've talked about candy bars before, and I've proclaimed that I enjoy a Mounds bar more than an Almond Joy, regardless of the fact that it's been ridiculously named. Mounds? Couldn't they do better than that? Why not Heaps or Piles or Clumps?

Alas, there's no turning back now, and I guess that in the grand scheme of things, it doesn't really matter. I just wish they had consulted me--I have a knack for naming things.

The good news is that a flavor combination can have a silly name and still be amazingly delicious. That's how I feel about chocolate and coconut, and almonds are a nice bonus. These little cupcakes are coconut-flavored and get topped with an almond-infused chocolate buttercream. To finalize things, the garnish on top consists of coconut and sliced almonds, both toasted.

Unhinge jaw, insert tasty treat.

Clumps Cupcakes (with a little Almond Happiness)
(inspired by Martha)

Cupcakes:
1 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup packed sweetened shredded coconut
6 ounces (1 1/2 sticks) unsalted butter, softened
1 1/3 cups sugar
2 large eggs, plus 2 large egg whites
3/4 cup unsweetened coconut milk
1 1/2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract

Frosting:
8 oz. unsweetened chocolate, chopped
6 cups powdered sugar
16 tablespoons (2 sticks) unsalted butter
6 tablespoons milk, plus more, if needed
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 teaspoon almond extract
1/4 teaspoon salt

1 cup sweetened coconut flakes, toasted
1/2 cup slivered almonds, toasted

To make the cupcakes, first preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Line standard muffin tins with paper liners. Whisk dry ingredients (including coconut) in a large bowl. Cream butter and sugar with a mixer until light and fluffy. Add eggs, one at a time, beating after each addition. Mix remaining wet ingredients in a bowl. Add dry ingredients to butter mixture in three additions, alternating with wet ingredients and ending with dry, scraping the sides of bowl occasionally. Divide the batter among the muffin cups, filling each 2/3 full. Bake until testers inserted into centers come out clean, about 20 minutes. Let cool in tins on wire racks.

To make the frosting, put the chocolate in the top pan of a double boiler set over but not touching simmering water in the bottom pan. Stir until the chocolate is melted and smooth. Let cool to room temperature. In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the flat beater, combine the powdered sugar, butter, milk, extracts, and salt and beat on low speed until combined, about 1 minute. Stop the mixer and scrape down the sides of the bowl. Increase the speed to medium and beat for 2 minutes, then reduce the speed to low. Add the chocolate and beat until combined, then increase the speed to medium and beat for 1 minute more.
If the frosting is dry, add more milk, 1 teaspoon at a time, until it is creamy but still holds peaks. This makes about 4 1/2 cups, which is more than enough to frost 21 cupcakes. Deal with the rest as you see fit.

read more words!

fail me not #OXOgoodcookies

Impossible Almond Joy pie. Did you know "oxo" was an accepted word on the Words with Friends game? It comes in handy a lot.

read more words!

flapjack* lovers unite!

*In this case, I mean American flapjacks, which are not to be confused with the British type.

read more words!

my muse?

I feel like whenever I'm searching for a way to give whatever I happen to be baking an inspired twist, I turn to the Almond Joy. That kind of makes her my muse, right? I use the feminine pronoun because I've decided that an appropriate name for this muse must be Joya. Joya d'Almond.

Too silly? Nah. Regardless of what she's called, or if she's ever called anything at all, she does good work. This latest creation began as a simple batch of cream cheese brownies, but ended up as almond brownies with a coconut cream cheese swirl.

That's what I call gooey.

Lots of different textures (I used both shredded coconut and coconut extract to flavor the cream cheese filling) and lots of delicious flavors join forces to create a decadent and relatively easy and quick dessert!

Joya d'Almond Brownies
Brownies:
6 tablespoons butter
4 ounces unsweetened chocolate, chopped
2/3 cup granulated sugar
2 eggs, room temperature
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon unsweetened cocoa powder
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 cup almonds, sliced

Filling:
8 ounces cream cheese, room temperature
1 egg yolk
5 tablespoons granulated sugar
1 teaspoon coconut extract
1/2 cup sweetened coconut flakes

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Spray a 9-inch square pan with non-stick spray or grease lightly.
Melt the butter and chocolate in the microwave or over low heat, stirring until smooth. Beat in the sugar and eggs. Mix in the flour, cocoa powder, and salt, then add in the vanilla. Stir in the almonds. Spread evenly in the prepared pan.
In a separate bowl, beat together the cream cheese, egg yolk, sugar, and coconut extract until smooth. Stir in the shredded coconut. Distribute the cream cheese mixture in eight dollops across the top of the brownie mixture, then take a dull knife or spatula and swirl the cream cheese mixture with the chocolate batter. Bake for 30 minutes, or until the batter in the center of the pan feels just set. Let cool, then cut the brownies into squares, rectangles, hearts, what-have-you.

read more words!

cake mix kick

One of my biggest kitchen-related dilemmas is trying to decide whether using a cake mix is a bad thing (preservatives! slothitude!) or a good thing (quick! easy! cheap!). Yes, I clearly lead a tortured existence.

Droopy and weepy, but oh-so-scrumptious.

After my success with the almond joy cake (made with boxed cake mix and pudding mix) and having perused the latest book from the Cake Mix Doctor, I was inspired to break out the mix once again. The cake that caught my eye in the aforementioned cookbook by Anne Byrn was a layered spice cake with a filling consisting of tart 'n tangy apple butter goo and coated with a rich caramel frosting. Just try and tell me that doesn't sound amazing.

I made a few alterations here and there. First and foremost, carrot cake mix was what I found in the cabinet, so carrot cake mix was what I used. Secondly, in continuing with my maple kick, I added a bit of maple flavoring to both the cake and the frosting.  Oh, the smells coming out of my kitchen--they were enough to buckle your knees.

In case you missed it, today is Mother's Day. I have a mother; you might recall some of my pet names for her--Mammy, Mamster, Mamburger, and the like. She's a pretty great lady, and since she's keen on caramel frosting, I applied it to the cake even though I had a hunch it'd give me trouble. Not surprisingly, it was a pain in the patootie, dripping down the sides of the cake before it set, but it worked out all right. Yeah, it looks a bit sad and saggy, but it's worth the hassle since it tastes like heaven in goopy form. Plus, it's for my Mama-lama-ding-dong.

Happy Mother's Day, ladies!

Maple Carrot Cake with Apple Butter Filling and Caramel Frosting (in other words, Bliss)
adapted from The Cake Mix Doctor Returns by Anne Byrn

Cake:
1 box carrot cake mix
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1 cup sour cream
3/4 cup water
1/2 cup vegetable oil
3 eggs
1 teaspoon maple flavoring

Filling:
1 egg
1/3 cup buttermilk
2 cups apple butter
2 tablespoons butter
1 cup walnuts, chopped

Frosting:
8 tablespoons butter
1 cup brown sugar, tightly packed
1/4 cup milk
2-3 cups powdered sugar
1/2 teaspoon maple flavoring
1/2 teaspoon salt

Make the cake:
Preheat oven to 350F and thoroughly spray three 9-inch round cake pans.
Combine cake ingredients in a large bowl and beat until well-incorporated. Divide among the three prepared pans and bake for 16-18 minutes, or until the toothpick test is passed. Let the layers cool for 10 minutes in the pans and then carefully remove them onto cooling racks until they become completely cooled.

Make the filling:
Beat the egg in a small bowl until it becomes lemon-colored. Add the buttermilk and blend well. In a separate bowl, heat the apple butter in the microwave or over medium heat until it becomes bubbly. Temper in the egg mixture and then heat the filling another 3 to 4 minutes until it thickens. Add in the butter and stir until it melts. Stir in the walnuts and let cool.

Assemble cake:
Transfer one layer to a plate or cake stand and spread half of the filling on top. Repeat with second layer and the rest of the filling. Top with the third layer and set cake aside.

Make frosting:
Heat the butter and brown sugar over medium heat until the mixture comes to a boil, about 2 minutes. Add the milk, stir, and bring the mixture back to a boil, then remove the pan from the heat. Let the mixture cool a bit and whisk in the powdered sugar until thickened and smooth, lightened in color, and beginning to lose its sheen. Stir in the flavoring at the last minute and stir to combine.  Pour the frosting onto the top of the cake quickly before it hardens, smoothing as you go. It's tricky to get the sides just right, but do what you can! Let the frosting harden before attempting to slice the beast.

read more words!

no holds barred

Fact: I prefer bars over cookies (as evidenced by the fact that I have twice as many bar posts as cookie posts). Clearly, this isn't because I make 50 batches or so a week for my job--if anything, that's a deterrent!

No, I like a)their simplicity in making and baking, b)the fact that just about any typical cookie dough can be pressed into a pan and turned into a bar, and c)you can cut each bar as large or as small as you feel you need at that moment.

These beauts are an example of cookie-inspired bars. When one examines the macaroon (my definition of it, anyway--many variations exist), one finds coconut combined with egg whites and sugar and baked in little blobs that often get dipped in chocolate after cooling. Ground nuts are sometimes involved.

The similarities between these bars and coconut macaroons begin and end with the presence of coconut, chocolate, and nuts. I think these are more like short and squashed Mounds or Almond Joy bars, and that's thrilling to me. The filling is something I can see myself using between cake layers or as a slightly sinful snack. My next plan of attack is to double the filling, cut them into long, thin rectangles, and pour chocolate such that it drapes over the sides and the end result is more candy-bar-like. Who would ever want a dinky little cookie after that?

Mounds-ish Macaroon Bars
(from Hershey's)
2 cups oreo cookie crumbs
6 tablespoons (3 oz) butter or margarine, melted
6 tablespoons powdered sugar
1 can (14 oz) sweetened condensed milk (not evaporated milk)
3-3/4 cups sweetened coconut flakes
1 cup almonds
1 cup chocolate chips
1/4 cup whipping cream
1/2 cup vanilla or white chocolate chips

Heat oven to 350°F. Grease 13x9x2-inch baking pan.
Combine crumbs, melted butter, and powdered sugar in large bowl. Firmly press crumb mixture on bottom of prepared pan. Stir together sweetened condensed milk, coconut, and almonds in large bowl, mixing well. Carefully drop mixture by spoonfuls over crust; spread evenly.
Bake 20 to 25 minutes or until coconut edges just begin to brown. Cool.
Place chocolate chips and whipping cream in medium microwave-safe bowl. Microwave 1 minute; stir. If necessary, microwave an additional 15 seconds at a time, stirring after each heating, until chips are melted and mixture is smooth when stirred. Cool until slightly thickened; spread over cooled bars. Sprinkle top with white chips. Cover; refrigerate several hours or until thoroughly chilled. Cut into bars.

read more words!