A Southern Grace: wax on, wax off

August 26, 2008

wax on, wax off

Yum

I had a thought-provoking drive to work yesterday morning, for three reasons.

(Two for the price of one--my kind of ear of corn!)

First, I saw not one, not two, but three partner-less shoes strewn along the Thruway. How does this happen? How does one shoe find its way out the window? I find it completely baffling, yet see it all the time.

Second, the morning djs on my favorite radio station are idiots. They were making fun of one of their interns because he thought Washington D.C. was located in the state of Washington. Yeah, that's pretty bad, but when he asked them where it really was, they unanimously declared that it was in Virginia. Dolts.

Finally, I was passed by one of the most unique vehicles I've ever seen. The vehicle itself wasn't unique--it was a plain ol' minivan. No, what made it unique was the set of what had to be moose antlers adhered to the roof. I laughed out loud, and I'm still chuckling about it.


Here's a poser--who would want to eat a bean that's reminiscent of wax? The name just doesn't sound particularly appetizing.

One of my co-workers has a lovely garden and he has recently taken pity on me and offered to share his bounty. My first bag of goodies contained a few cucumbers, several banana peppers, and a whole bunch of yellow wax beans.

Here's my dilemma, folks: I've never before dealt with wax beans. I was raised on green beans--the kind with lots of strings (do you call them string beans?) that you snap into bite-size pieces (perhaps you call them snap beans). I'm not sure what to do with these little yellow sticks and will gladly accept any suggestions you might have.


In the meantime, watch out for mutant corn, rogue shoes, stupid radio personalities, and armed minivans.

49 comments:

Anonymous said...

Grace you are a hoot and a hollar. I think the shoe thing is only found up North because, down here we go barefoot most of the time. It seems to me that you would use them the same as you would green beans, though I am not fond of the yellow bean at all.

KJ said...

Sorry, I have never heard of yellow wax beans. I also have no idea how single shoes find there way out of cars. So I'm no help at all. It's a common theme with me.

Albany Jane said...

I've just been eating them like regular green beans - cook em up quick. I think they're actually a little sweeter, but it could just be the bright yellow color subtly influencing me.

Bunny said...

Sometimes we see sneakers that somebody has tied together with the laces hanging from the phone lines.....kids. I would just use the yellow beans like green beans Grace, or come up with a really good recipe you can share with all of us!

Lori said...

The ones hanging from the electric lines are markers for territory of gangs. The ones on the side of the road on the highway crack me up too. So funny. My friend and I use to sing a song about it. There recently was an artist who took pics of all the shoes across America. Isnt that a hoot!

Wax beans should be treated essentially the same.

Lucy..♥ said...

Not sure about wax beans, either... but that corn looks mighty good... we had some freshly picked corn that was pure sweetness in all it's glory!

Anonymous said...

Three Bean Salad, of course!! :o) (Maybe not sophisticated enough for you, but I love it! Perfect for a Labor Day cookout?)

Anonymous said...

I don't know about the partnerless shoes but can someone tell me where the partnerless socks go?

Oooh I have an idea, try making sweetcorn ice cream. Honestly so delicious. I made it ages ago when I had some delicious white corn. Here's a link if you dare ;) http://www.notquitenigella.com/2007/10/01/sweet-corn-ice-cream/

Sharon said...

Perhaps the partner-less shoes are from hitchhikers who decide their plight looks that much more dreadful when they only have one shoe? I have another theory but it's kind of creepy so I'll keep it to myself.

Wax beans, huh? This one sounds tasty as everything is good with honey:
http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/HONEY-GLAZED-WAX-BEANS-106372

kat said...

I always wonder too, how does someone not notice they've lost one shoe?!

Deborah said...

You always make me laugh! I don't think I've ever had wax beans before, so I don't think I can help you.

LyB said...

lol! You had quite the drive to work, didn't you? I am so jealous of your fresh from the garden beans. They are usually much more tender than the ones at the grocery store. And yes, essentially you can make pretty much the same thing with them that you would with green beans. Just don't over cook them, they get mushy and tasteless. Tell us what you do make with them, OK!

Pam said...

Grace - you crack me up. I am always amazed at seeing shoes on the side of the road and also flung over power lines - who does that? I haven't cooked with wax beans at all so I am no help but the corn looks fabulous!

eatingclubvancouver_js said...

Mutant corn! I was always afraid of these twinned things, for some reason. I never could eat a twinned banana, so I don't think I could have eaten this twinned corn.

Anonymous said...

As a girl originally from the north, I can agree that the shoe thing seems to be northern- I've seen them thrown over telephone wires in the town I grew up in. I don't understand it either!
Now, as for the wax beans, my uncle makes a fantastic bean salad using wax beans, kidney beans, a little vinegar, sugar, diced onion, and diced bread and butter pickles. Maybe that's northern too. :)

Melissa said...

but when he asked them where it really was, they unanimously declared that it was in Virginia

Brilliant.

Sandie said...

Funny, I see partner-less shoes all over the Midwest, often at intersections.

Admission: When I was 3-years-old I threw a single one of my favorite red cowboy boots out of the car window just to see what would happen. I was stunned.

Perhaps that's what's happening. Honestly, I'm always disturbed when I see baby or kid shoes along the road. My mind races and heart prays they aren't some leftover reminder of a tragedy or crime scene.

Wax beans? My mother made them OFTEN when I was growing up. She cooked them just like she would regular green beans. I don't remember them being terribly ucky, other than the name always turned me off.

Anonymous said...

Thank goodness radio djs aren't in control of anything important. You know, like spelling potatoe ;)

Thistlemoon said...

My vote is for three bean salad! Although I am sure they would taste great cooked anyway that you would like green beans!

Emily said...

Interesting day.
Ummmm...I don't know what to do with those beans. I've never had them before.

OhioMom said...

The DH and I walk every morning, year round (yes in ice and snow too:) and we see the strangest items discarded on the street/sidewalks .. shoes, socks, panties, pantyhose, clothes .. and of course the inconsiderate dog walkers who let their pets leave packages right in the middle of the sidewalk.

Wax beans .. I like them in 3-bean salad :)

Leslie said...

Um yeah..what IS up with the shoe issue? I see it all the time as well. Maybe they are people who are abducted by aliens..but the aliens only take ONE shoe and throw the other on back down from outter space?LOL..Sounds like a good theory to me!!LOL

vanillasugarblog said...

Oh I am so with you on the shoe thingee. I see so many single shoes on the highway and on the scenic highway here on cape cod, and I am the freakazoid that is always looking and a wondering where is the other shoe??
LOLOLOL!! Girl, you're too funny

Katie said...

Singles Shoes on the highway scare me. I always thinks its from like a murder victim or something. But I like the freaky corn. But its a little to early for corn season for me.

The Blonde Duck said...

I thought it was corn! LOL. I know if you see shoes tied to electric lines it's a bad sign. Although when I was growing up they tied shoes to buoys on the lake to be funny...there's nothing like waterskiing under a pair of dangling shoes.

Sandi @the WhistleStop Cafe said...

Hmmmmm~
I was just wondering about french cut beans... that would be right up there with wax beans.

krysta said...

radio dj's are a special kind of stupid as for the shoe thing i always see them up on the power lines... my kids alsways ask, 'who would waste a perfectly good pair of shoes?'

Gigi said...

Grace, you would pee on yourself everyday here Cali. from laughing at all the idiots that drive. People here have no idea how to strap/tie things down on a vehicle. I have seen a mattress (on fire btw), a bath tub, and many large kitchen appliances on the side of the road. OH, and at EVERY freeway entrance ramp there is a lovely person selling you produce, flowers, or tube socks! Great post!

Prudy said...

I say you boil them and toss them in butter, bacon and onions, just to give them a little bit of your southern flair.

giz said...

As they say - only in America!!!! We just hang our antlers in pubs :). So nice to have these thought provoking moments with no real solutions. Crazy making deluxe.

Anonymous said...

For the past two weeks, on the walk to school, we have seen...at least 5 times, a random shoe or flip flop in the road or on the sidewalk. Like you, I just don't quite get how that happens!

Ann said...

Okay, wow. I'm now wondering if my Mom gave birth to twins and gave you away. Or, if your Mom gave birth to twins and gave me away. Could you ask your Mom?

Because those thought you had in your head? Those are mine, sister.

I don't even want to admit it public how much time I've spent thinking about single shoes on the highway.

Wait, I just did.

Laura said...

I've always treated wax and string beans the same.

Your observations cracked me up, esp the one about the matchless shoes on the roads. Great pics of the corn, also.

Robin said...

Too funny! We have a guy or lady, I can't really tell which who drives a purple, like lilac purple mini van around here with at least 200 dinosaurs glued to the roof and hood. Crazy. I had wax beans once, they taste sort of like green beans. I guess shoes on the road are a new road rage. Folks just chuck a shoe when they are ticked that someone has cut them off!

Y said...

Funny corn, funny post. Can't really add much else, I'm afraid :D

Anonymous said...

Not sure what to do with wax beans...not a big fan! Great photos though and funny antedote about matchless shoes!!!

Rosie said...

I've ever had wax beans before. keeping my eyes open for the mutant corn, rogue shoes lol

Rosie x

Jessica@Foodmayhem said...

I've never made wax beans either...I have eaten them though....that mutant corn scares me, especially since most of the corn we get is genetically modified. =/

RecipeGirl said...

Thank you for the fun laugh this AM :) The car-detailing place that we use is called "Wax On, Wax Off." Funny, eh? Ok, not really funny but timely anyway.

No suggestions for ya on the waxed beans. I'd go a googling...

Anonymous said...

LOL Grace,
Have you seen the sneaking hung over the wires of a telephone pole? That'll make you scratch your head. I believe yellow wax beans are treated the same as green, steam, saute etc. Love to see what you so with them. I think the mutant corn is kinda cute (does that make me weird?)

Anonymous said...

Oh how I miss the corn of the East Coast! Of course, I'm also glad you gave me a good laugh. I've always wondered that about shoes on the side of the road too.

Anonymous said...

I have no clue on the wax beans since I've never seen them before except listed on the ingredients for Three-Bean Salad. As far as the shoes go, I think it's one of two things: they fall out of the back of pick-up trucks when the tail gate's down, or one brother throws the other brother's shoes out the window to piss him off. You know. Because he took his shoes off in the car and his feet stink. Now ask me. Has this happened to me before?

Gloria Baker said...

Hi Dear Grace, I love these!! I have in my Blog a delicious little corn's pie, is with meat filling but we made alot of times only the corn's paste that we call "pastelera" is so yummy if you want to see, xxxGloria

Anonymous said...

I also vote for three bean salad though the recipe I've been eating since I was a kid used canned yellow wax beans.

La Bella Cooks said...

I personally love the shoes thrown over the power lines. Those crack me up.

Alicia Foodycat said...

In the very safe, suburban bit of Sydney where I lived there were always shoes over the power lines. What was that? Rich white kids wanting a bit of street-cred?

adrienne said...

My oh my, what a beautiful ear of corn that is! Makes my mouth water!

Jeanne said...

LOL - clearly in every pair of shoes there's always one partner who's intent on escape! I know what you mean though - some mornings my communte on the Tube leaves me feeling like Julius Caesar on his way to the Forun with all sorts of omens and portents around. Surreal.

Never had yellow beans. I believe them to be an ill omen, like when the entrails fall all wrong, bringing on the mutant corn harvest :)

Lisa said...

You are too funny! I guess I'm not the only one to come up with profound thoughts while I'm driving! :-)
What's more, I have more than once encountered people who seemed doubtful that there was a difference between Washington DC and Washington State. I once tried to make a hotel reservation back east where the reservation clerk asked for my address. When I said that I lived in Washington she asked, "Washington DC?" When I said, "No, Washington state?" She answered, "Washington is a state? Are you sure? Are you kidding me?" It boggles the mind....