the delicious dictionary

I've stumbled upon a hilarious dictionary of foodie terms. So many of them apply to me that it makes me laugh out loud.


I've picked out a few that are particularly applicable to lil' ol' me or are just flat out hilarious.

(my additions are in green)

ADD--"Attention Deficit Dining," a disorder in which a person takes 45 minutes to decide where to eat (yeah, that's typically an all-day process for me...), then changes her mind at least 4 (possibly 14) times before ending up at the original choice (spot on, right Little Brother?)
ex. Don't ask her where she wants to eat; we should just pick and tell her. She has ADD.

baby bear--inspired the fairy tale Goldilocks and the Three Bears, someone who eats anything and finds it "just right";you should not eat with this person because clearly he has no taste
ex. "It doesn't matter where we eat. He's a baby bear."

dining disorder--a general term for any of several mental conditions including ADD (see above), OCD, chronic brunchitis, and semi-homemade cooking, among others

firrhea--GI syndrome that results in a burning release from the bottom that is often as explosive as a volcano; most likely the result of eating too-spicy foods (come on, most of us have been there...right?)



Goldilocks--derived in the same way as "baby bear" (see above), one who is never happy with what she is eating--everything is "too hot" or "too cold," never "just right" (I will now answer to "Goldilocks" from here on out)


mental bakedown--handling a mental breakdown, extreme stress, or a mid-life/quarter-life crisis by withdrawing into the kitchen and making ridiculous amounts of fattening baked goods (usually followed by eating at least half of them)


I hope you got a chuckle out of some of those.